Updates

Moving has kept us so busy. Recently I have been in touch with the previous Associate Pastor of West Vallely Fellowship, and friend of Andy Tryon for 20+ years, Bill Stansbury. He recently had a situation with Andy Tryon in which he caught Andy in a full out lie. I have been given permission to summarize the situation and to post letters written to Andy Tryon, in which He is confronted for his straight up lying tactics and devious practices.
In this situation, Andy Tryon is caught in a lie straight through his teeth, face to face, with his best friend Bill Stansbury. Some of the lies include Andy Tryon's presumptuousness of imputing HIS thoughts about someone as though they are fact when the TRUTH is the complete oppossite of the lie that was fabricated. The situation is between a young woman who is caught up in an abusive relationship. She seeks to end the relationship Biblically as is specified in the Word of Yehoshua. Andy Tryon fabricated an attitude and lied straight faced to his best friend about the womans attitude towards him.
I know Bill very well and I know that Bill, like me, has a very photographic memory. Apparently Andy Tryon forgot this when confronted about it. Bill spotted the lie straight away. After seeing the hypocricy Bill resigned his position as the associate pastor. This all came shortly after another very good friend, also of what I recall possibly 20+ years as well, left the church because of the hypocrisy that is played out among that church through Andy Tryon and his Wife Jackie Tryon.

Please be careful! I am posting this to warn you all of the dangers of this cultic leader and the guises and practices used to manipulate and snare the feet of the righteous! Please, if you are one who is enslaved there, seek the truth, pray for protection and observe. Don't blindly ignore the sure signs of the wicked oppresion you're being controlled by. Here are some things to look for and observe, as expressed by Rick Ross a studied, published authority on this subject:

Tools of Mind Control:

1. Control environment: Loved ones are cut off from family, no communication.

2. Break down sense of self: Break down their sense of self-esteem, literally attack them as individuals on the basis that they are wrong and that the group is right.

3. Instill new sense of identity: New identity is reinforced by the group environment, where you get no feedback except from other members who tell you that they understand the right behavior and the right way of being.

4. Isolate: Cut off from outside world. Fear keeps them trapped inside the environment of the group.


Warning Signs of a Potentially Harmful Group/Leader:

1. Totalitarian: Absolute authoritarianism without meaningful accountability.

2. Little tolerance: No place for questions or critical inquiry.

3. Unreasonable fears: Unreasonable fear about the outside world, such as impending catastrophe, evil conspiracies and persecutions.

4. Never good enough: Followers feel they can never be good enough.

5. No reason to leave: Former followers are always wrong in leaving, negative or even evil.


People Who Are Vulnerable to Mind Control:

Rick says that people who have been brainwashed come from all walks of life, regardless of education, social status, family background and/or intelligence. However, the people who are more vulnerable to mind control are those going through a difficult time in life and/or a transition:

1. Recently divorced
2. Illness
3. Personal tragedy
4. Career failure
5. Away from home for the first time


Warning Signs of a Brainwashed Victim:

1. Obsessive: Extreme obsessiveness regarding the group/leader resulting in the exclusion of almost every practical consideration.

2. Dependency: Dependency upon the group/leader for problem solving, solutions, and definitions without meaningful reflective thought, a seeming inability to think independently or analyze situations without group/leader involvement.

3. Agrees with group: Anything the group/leader does can be justified no matter how harsh or harmful.

4. Loss of spontaneity: A dramatic loss of spontaneity and sense of humor.

5. Isolation: Increasing isolation from family and old friends unless they demonstrate an interest in the group/leader.


How to Avoid Mind Control:

"Don’t be naïve. You can protect yourself from unsafe groups and leaders by developing a good BS detector. Check things out, know the facts and examine the evidence. A safe group will be patient with your decision-making process. If a group or leader grows angry and anxious just because you want to make an informed and careful decision before joining; beware," Rick says.

http://www.rickross.com/mind_control.html

I am now going to post these letters here in the open. I must put a forewarning as things are revealed that have been hidden in hypocritical masks and swept under rugs for years!

All of the verifiable accusations have been verified plus much more that are not included in the letters. The last letter is from the assoicate pastor who left when much of this came to light and the senior pastor (Andy Tryon) gave no consideration to the womans plight except a few minutes of lips service after she packed up and left. He supportted the man (the abusive husband) unconditionally, and refused to hear the evidence against him and made excuses when evidence did surface. He openly stated that his opinion was the only one that counted.

Letter from abused wife to husband:

******,

I am writing this letter to tell you I am leaving and the reasons I have left. I can no longer tolerate yourself centered narcissistic, holier than thou attitude nor your self-serving, lying, manipulative, controlling, head games. Your hypocrisy with Pastor Andy is more disgusting than your hypocrisy with me. We cannot study Scripture together without you pointing out my faults from Scripture and in the same breath you deny your own. You use Scripture as a tool in an attempt to drive me away from Jesus and His word rather than lead me to Him. You are damaging to my spiritual growth rather than an aid. You have listened to Andy and his recorded sermons for the sole purpose of being able to respond properly to his questions and the situation between us but then you tell me in private how many things you disagree with in his teachings which, is a prime example of your manipulating games. Most of what you do agree with is those portions that you can twist to justify being a tyrant in your house rather than a Godly leader. The Love Dare book that Andy has instructed all of us to use, you question its usefulness and even referred to it as Dr Filthy-ish because you cannot handle the honesty that I have given you while doing the book. You discuss our progress or lack thereof with Andy and numerous other people in the Church and refer to some of our dares as total wars with missiles and arrows flying at each other. Are you trying to show me love or are you trying to convince Andy and everyone else that I am unlovable? You question everything I write as though you are looking for a different answer or to have your narcissistic ego stroked. I have been completely honest on all of the dares and I am sorry if it is not what you want to hear but it is the truth.

You smile in Andy’s face call him our spiritual leader then revile his family in private. Either out of jealousy because his children are superior to any you have raised or in the case of Andrew because even at 19 he is several times the man you are and his relationship with Emily, who you call, “a cold hearted little bitch,” is better than ours has ever been. You have now even accused him of steroid use. You have warned me that, “Jackie is a Bitch and a backstabber be careful what you say to her because she will use it against you. She is not a likeable person.” According to you, “Bobby is dark and evil no better than Morgan.” “April is fat and lazy and should be embarrassed about how big she is.” The final insult to Pastor Andy is your comment that the two of you are exactly the same, that Andy treats his wife and kids the same way you treat yours. I don’t know which scenario is worse your arrogance that you are Andy’s equal as a man or that you believe Andy is as pathetic a male (you have no manly qualities) as you are. After all of this you still smile at Andy, eat, drink, smoke and enjoy his hospitality which is pathetic manipulation for your own gain proof of your self-centeredness.

Andy gave us a clean slate yet you constantly bring up 3 years ago and tell me I should beg your forgiveness, proof that you have not forgiven me in spite of your tearful act in front of Andy and yet you have Andy convinced I’m the unforgiving one. If I try and defend myself against your lies I become a lying, divisive, unforgiving bleeding cunt (just thought you would like to know the vile things I've been called because of your lies) even though I have forgiven you and told you numerous times that I have forgiven you and do not bring up the past even when you try manipulating me into doing so. You demand I beg for your forgiveness as if you are God but I only desire the forgiveness of Jesus who is God. For your own sake I hope you can forgive me before it’s too late because you cannot be forgiven by Jesus until you do. Jesus’ own words. You want me to tell you that you are “safe” in our marriage and when I do you do not accept it because I put stipulations on it. If you consider Jesus a stipulation you have bigger problem than our relationship.

I’m expected to go to great lengths to fill your love tank but your attitude toward me is that you should be able to say you love me (actions to the contrary) and I should fall at your feet in total love. You are completely without compassion for others thinking only about yourself. Quite simply you are the same as you have been for our entire marriage you have made no effort to change, it is only just an act and you have no intention of changing. I have no hope of you ever changing because your self-righteous attitude prevents you from seeing the need to change. I will give you credit for attempting change over the last 2 weeks but it never lasts and is only an act to make things better, as soon as you feel the act has worked you will revert right back into the same pattern. It has been this way with you for over 19 years. History continues to repeat itself with you. I have come to believe that the only reason you wanted to stay married 3 years ago is because your ego demands you be in control over someone and with me and maybe Collin gone you will have no one to rule over and you’re not man enough or enough of a leader to lead men. Your work ethic during our marriage proves you must have someone to motivate you or you will not work nor can you hold a job. Your work performance over the last month proves it. You have had multiple Job’s to do in Vegas but you stay home and make me miserable in one case forcing me to pay Willie $25.00 an hour to do your job. This not only negatively affects our finances but how much we have available for tithes and offerings in support of the church that you claim to love with your mouth but revile with you actions. The only conclusion I can come to is that your desire to stay married is purely self-centered. You’re laziness demands and your desire is for a slave girl not a help meet.

You take enjoyment from my misery and proof of this is the smile you had on your face while Andy was focused on me and chewing me out however polite that chewing out was. Your mistake was that when you leaned forward to be out of Andy’s peripheral vision so you could hide your smile from him you placed yourself in mine. Andy claimed that you tried to protect me yet every time you speak to Andy it results in him getting irritated with me. He didn’t see it as more of your well practice manipulation. I would be better off if you didn’t protect me even though it’s one of your Scriptural duties as a husband even to your dying breath if necessary. Just another example of your utter failure to follow Scripture when doing so is inconvenient to your goals. In our business you have broken corporate laws and comingled funds (not everything is a write off) putting us/me at risk of financial disaster and federal prosecution and you wonder why I don’t believe you love me or will protect me. You asked me once how could I think about entering these end times alone but I would be better off alone than with a man who will not protect me. You have proven yourself unfaithful in even the smallest measure concerning this issue and Jesus taught quite clearly that if your unfaithful in little things you cannot be faithful in large things. I am better off alone than being with and depending on a man who would quickly fail me.

You now know where I stand and my opinion of you and yet I forgive you of all your failings but I will never again subject myself to your abusive control, manipulation and anger. I was truthful when I told Andy I wanted to reconcile but now I realize I wanted it for the wrong reasons. I wanted it because it would keep peace in the church and be pleasing to pastor Andy. If Andy would have asked me if I wanted to be married to you my honest answer would have been no. While not a Biblical scholar I have searched Scripture for what constitutes a marriage in the eyes of God and I cannot find anywhere that says having a ceremony, someone making an announcement of husband and wife and signing a paper qualifies as a marriage. The frequently used line that marriage was invented by man and sanctified in heaven cannot be found in Scripture. The only concept of marriage I can find is a man taking a woman to be his wife fulfilling his Biblical duties to her and having her reciprocate and in doing so becoming one flesh. At no time in our marriage has this ever taken place as neither one of us fulfilled our Biblical duties to the other. Your self-righteous attitude prevents you from changing and your actions and words are proof of such so I have no hope in us ever having a marriage in the eyes of God.

Your actions lately have been very worrisome to me. The things that you have said to me actually have me very scared of what you could be capable of doing to me or yourself. Your irrational paranoia and Jealousy is out of control. To say that all men are after me and everyone falls in love with me, you can’t take me out in public because I am way to hot and someone could take me away from you and that even men in the Church are after me including Andy and Bill is just insane. You say I am/we are a Biblical paradigm with the Story of Abraham and Sarah, that because Sarah was so Beautiful that Abraham had to lie and say she was his sister and then on another day you tell me that she committed sins and that you are just trying to keep me from committing sin like Sarah. That’s not the story at all and that is what you said.

I have come to realize that God values the individuals in a marriage more than he values the marriage. Marriage is instituted by God for people’s protection and well-being. It’s meant to be a safe place that serves the needs God wired into us when he made us: needs for intimacy and union and procreation as well as the need to mature and grow to become more loving people. It’s meant to serve our needs by providing a safe place for us to thrive. We were not created to serve it. It was created to serve us. People are what matter to God.

In other words, God’s mercy trumps God’s laws. You can’t read the gospels and all the accounts of Jesus’ healing on the Sabbath or fraternizing with the “unclean” and miss that! God’s first priority is to always love people. They rank higher than the institutions or the laws that are meant to protect them. Jesus would never allow someone’s spirit and soul to be crushed so that a rule might be upheld. He is not in favor of marriage (keeping a legal vow) at the expense of someone’s eternal life, as you have failed to lead me to Jesus by twisting Scripture to serve your self-centered narcissistic agenda I have no choice but to leave and remove myself from your ungodly control. I cannot serve two masters I have come to love the one "Jesus" and despise the other "you" because you interfere with me serving the one I love. You are not fulfilling your God given duties as a husband so you are not serving God I can no longer be with someone or in a house that does not do so you have had three years under Andy's teachings and mentorship and you still refuse to be a Godly husband or man and only live to serve yourself.

You haven’t changed, you are not trying to lead me to Jesus you are only trying to confuse me and manipulate the Scriptures to fit your needs. What you have not paid attention to is that I study the Scripture way more than you realize and much more than you do nowadays.

I am sorry to say this but I do not love you anymore and I have not felt love for you in quite some time. I have tried over the last month or so and especially the last few weeks but it’s just not there anymore. My love tank is dried up and no matter what you try to do to fill my love tank it is not working nor will it work because I cannot trust that you are genuine in your attempts. I do not trust that it is real or that it will continue. You have harassed me continually to promise not to leave you over the last couple of weeks because as soon as I do your off the hook to try or even maintain the act.

I cannot manufacture unconditional love (or agape love) out of my own heart. It's impossible. It's beyond my capabilities. It's beyond all our capabilities. I may be able to demonstrate kindness or unselfishness in some form, and I may have learned to be more thoughtful and considerate. But sincerely loving you unselfishly and unconditionally is another matter altogether. This is not something I can do on my own. I have tried, believe me I have tried. And how many times have I set myself up for failure. Too many times to count. I don't even want to begin thinking about how many times there are just too many!! I can't give what I don't have. I, myself, don't have the strength, the inner resources, the resolve to do this on my own.

I have no intention of being vindictive and if you will allow a non-contested divorce you can have just about everything. I just want to end the misery in my life an attempt to build a new one this time with Jesus in it from the beginning. I will be taking the dogs due to your inability to take care of them and work in Vegas when you complete your contracts there and if you start working locally we can discuss who gets what dogs. You know as well as I do that with your work being in Vegas that it is best they come with me. I will come and get them in a few days.

As far as Collin goes I will be extending the offer to come with me or stay here with you. It is ultimately his choice as I am the one leaving you I will not force Collin to do the same but in the same breath I am in no way leaving my son either. He is very capable of making his own decision on which one of us he chooses to live with.

I forgive you but forgiveness aside I will not tolerate any type of harassment in any form. Do not follow me, show up at my work or residence uninvited, do not call or email me except what is absolutely necessary for processing the divorce. Under no circumstances are you to try and make physical contact with me in any manner if you do I will consider it a threat to my person and react accordingly. Should you fail to follow these instructions I will use the system to stop you to include restraining orders, filing stalking charges and or an injunction against harassment. If you make me do this you will lose your second amendment rights so it’s your choice based on your actions.

Finally I will not tolerate even the slightest lie spread about me in the church, to Collin or elsewhere. In the interest of self defense from your lies and manipulation I have recorded a few of our conversations which are proof from your own mouth about of some of the things in this letter.( this is why I have been on my phone so much , recording, saving, labeling & emailing ) I do not wish to harm the church or cause Andy any more grief but I will not stand to be lied about and if such does happen I will make these recordings available, again your choice based on your actions.

Final Letter from Abused wife to husband:

****

I have built a fortress around myself . . .

To protect my emotions

To protect my self-esteem

To protect my individualism

This fortress will not allow me to share my heart with you, or express any affection

toward you. It protects me from you.

Once, before I built this wall, I trusted you completely—enough to pledge my life to you

and my future. When you first wounded my spirit, I believed you when you told me it

was my fault. Yes, I was naive, but I trusted you. I believed the lie—if I could look

different and act different, then you would be pleased with me.

For many years I continued to believe and trust you while you continued to express your

disappointment in me and made me the scapegoat for all the reasons why you weren’t

happy. I was so vulnerable to your opinion of me that I accepted what you said about

me as true.

I tried in many ways to please you, but you were never satisfied. You pointed out

numerous areas in my life where I had failed. The talents and gifts that I had to offer

were either never good enough or taken for granted.

When I tried to share my deepest feelings with you, you made fun of my sensitivity by

lecturing me or making me feel stupid.

You were the one who controlled what I should think, what I should say, and who I

should say it to. If I made any comments of which you did not approve, you would

lecture me and question my motives.

You demanded all of my time and emotions for yourself, and when I didn’t meet your

expectations, you broke my spirit by constant criticism. You assured me that if I had performed to your liking you would have had no reason to be angry, so therefore it was my fault. You placed all the responsibility of your actions upon me.

Picture me as a woman who was constantly trying to please, but could never meet your

demands; one who didn’t know whether to speak or keep silent; and one who withheld

her emotions and deep feelings so she wouldn’t be ridiculed and embarrassed by the one

who should have understood her the best.

This defeating cycle of co-dependency had such a hold on me that my worth as a person

was dependent upon your value of me as a woman and a wife. It was easy for you to

use me as the reason for your problems . . . because I let you and I believed you!

As I struggled with my own feelings about myself versus the incompetent, uncaring

person that you described me to be, the Lord was working through many sources and I

began to find my identity in Him. I began to realize that I had allowed you to close my

spirit, and I had believed your perception of me to be true. This paralyzed my

ability to function, and several years passed by without any real growth and progress.

When I finally accepted and truly believed that my self-worth is only found in

the Lord, it changed my life!

My first reaction was to put the broken pieces of myself back together, and escape

from the awful control and manipulation in my life. I began rejecting your perception of me, and yes, I began rejecting you! I built walls of protection from you so that your verbal vomit and cruel attitudes would not hurt me anymore.

I began to live my own life, making my own plans, and daring to dream of living free and

happy without your control. I built walls so high and so thick there would be nothing you

could do to penetrate them.

When we began talking with the Pastor, you wrote a catalog of sins—my sins

that you believed had caused all our problems. Where are your sins? When have you

taken the time to take a really good look at who you are?

Look at the man who screams and strikes out when he’s upset, and then denies or

pretends that he’s not guilty; who manipulates the facts to make his wife look like she’s

either crazy or lying or unforgiving.

Look at the man who frowns and sneers when he talks to his wife, and then accuses

her of having a bad attitude.

Look at the man who is a master of manipulation, demanding his own way, his

opinion, and then accuses his wife of controlling when she is simply assuming the

responsibility he has declined to take.

You are so full of rage and bitterness that you have to blame someone, and that

someone has been me. It is interesting, however, that the very things you have said about

me are actually reflections of you.

You tell me not to get hysterical when you’re the one screaming and out of control. You tell me to change my attitude when you have the sneering, frowning face, and have made the sarcastic remarks.

You call me a liar when you have an ingrained habit of constantly manipulating and exaggerating the truth to meet your needs.

Because you are always on the edge, I walk on eggshells around you, never

knowing when something I say or do is going to set you off and cause an

explosion. It’s almost like being in a war and never knowing when I’m going to

step on a land mine and get blown up.

Now look at the way it could have been—my talents and abilities complementing yours, and

instead of rejecting, criticizing, and destroying me because I am not like you, we could have

established a wonderful friendship and partnership with each other, with each of us compensating for the lack of the other.

But instead you chose to abuse me, lie about me, manipulate and control not only me but everyone in my life that I truly love with all my heart. My son, My Church Family and yes even you.

Cruel words, like hot lava . . .
Suffocate desire
Silence hope
Scar the soul.

Who can see a wounded heart?
Pierced by missiles of hate and evil.

Who can treat a broken spirit?
Tortured by endless ranting and raving,
Defiled by your verbal abuse

O Lord, you are the Healer!
Consume me with your love
Pour your spirit, like warm, healing ointment, into my soul.
Revive my spirit
Renew my joy
Until I am restored.

Until the vicious attacks lose their power to penetrate
As I listen only to Your words of comfort and affirmation.

"There is no fear in love, but perfect love casteth out fear; because fear hath torment. He that feareth is not made perfect in love." 1 John 4:18

I have hurt you and for that I am sorry. I would have never stumbled into the arms of another man if you would have fulfilled your Godly duties as a husband.

I would have had no reason to seek Grace, Peace and Love from any other man had you provided it to me. But you choose to destroy my spirit and my self-worth throughout our entire marriage and because you choose that path I stumbled.

Yes, I am a sinner and I sinned against God and God alone with my decision to embrace the love and peace that another man genuinely as a real man has to offer and for that, as I have already done, I beg you for your forgiveness, I confess to you and to God my iniquity in this and I repent fully for my transgression.

Finally, if you thought for an instant that I could or would possibly return to our marriage after the ambush and total abuse of my soul and spirit you are completely delusional.

Refer back to my original letter to you as to what I will accept as communication from you.

There is nothing more than needs to be said on the subject of our marriage. It is utterly destroyed!

Letter from Abused Wife to Andy after a "matthew 18" meeting, which wasn't a Biblical Matthew 18... just as He did to myself and my now wife:

Andy,

This letter is my response to Sundays Matthew 18 meeting. I have to say that while the overall meeting was handled according to the Biblical description your performance and conduct were decidedly unbiblical and your prideful arrogance was a disgrace to the position you hold. You used your forceful personality and your hold over your family to get the agreement you wanted. I now know where Chris learned to cherry pick portions of Scripture and refine them to serve his purpose. Your attempt to act like the Pope and dissuade me from searching Scripture for myself as Scripture itself encourages us to do, failed. I do not look up Scripture to prove whether or not one person or the other is full of shit as you put it. I look up Scripture because I have been lied to about it so much I have learned to trust no one until I read the words for myself in context because out of context is pretext and sin as you have so often taught. I have now learned that I cannot trust you either because chapter 19 of Matt and 10 of Mark talks about men divorcing their wives because of the hardness of their hearts or any reason (read the text) not about women attempting to escape from an abusive husband who is detrimental to her spiritual welfare and who is forcing her to commit idolatry by making himself an idol to her. The passage begins in verse 3 and just like the Pharisees tried to use it to trip up Jesus you tried to use it to trip me up and sacrifice me to Chris’ demon. In fact, in Ezra 10, God told the Israelites to divorce their wives who worshiped idols. In Is. 50:1 and Jer. 3:8 God says he divorced Israel because of their Idolatry. Idolatry is absolutely a Biblical reason for divorce. I’m sure Chris would have gotten rid of me a long time ago but I (or someone who will put up with his abuse) am necessary for his survival as our separation is proving. He put me away after the rape for a while in every way but financially which he couldn’t do because he was unemployed which now of course he denies and conveniently blames on his memory. The test of the divorce will prove me true unless someone or multiples of people take my place. I also checked the Greek and the words are literally hard heart and have no similarity to [un]forgiveness as you said. If Jesus meant unforgiveness he would have used those words and Matthew would have recorded it as such. Jesus had no problem using forgive in all its derivatives elsewhere so I see no need to translate hard heart as unforgiveness. You have slammed other preachers and denominational dogmas for doing exactly what you’re doing here.

When you, Chris or your entire Pastoral staff accuses me where God does not, you are all making Idols of yourselves. You are saying that you hold your judgment of me higher than God’s judgment. You say that you are absolute authority and everything you say is God’s words to me; you are making and Idol of yourself. Jesus died to enable a personal relationship between each of us and God himself. Each of us must personally be chosen by Christ. Chris cannot do that for me and neither can you. Being chosen by Christ establishes a personal relationship with God: from that beginning the rest is a personal relationship as well. The Holy Spirit indwells each of us and speaks to each of us, personally. Any man who stands in the middle of that, and demands that his voice is greater than God’s to me, is making an Idol of himself.

I am obligated to God to separate myself from any man who demands that I serve two Masters and deny my Lord and Savior.

You and the Church need to quit tying chains of bondage around me. When you demand that I stay in an abusive marriage, you are participating in Idolatry. You are agreeing with a false god and telling me while under your supposed spiritual authority (Shepherd- servant guarding the flock for his Master) to deny my faith and serve a false god. I cannot make Jesus Lord of my life when all of you are trying to be lords over my heart and mind, leaving me unable to think correctly, living in constant fear rather than loving submission to God and each other. Instead you are helping Chris hold the doors to my cell shut. You’re guilty of some of the same idolatry as Catholicism who forced people to worship the institution of the church where you force women to worship the institution of marriage. Did Jesus take those stripes you are so fond of mentioning for institutions or individuals. Was man made for Sabbath or the Sabbath for man, what did Jesus [God] desire more, mercy and justice or legal sacrifice. So in the same line was man made for marriage or marriage for man. Jesus clearly taught that when legalistic following of institutions became detrimental to the individual the individual came first and He healed on the Sabbath to end the suffering of individuals. You on the other hand in your legalism just like the Pharisees are trying every way possible to heap up loads I can’t carry and prolong my suffering.

You have the ulterior motive in taking Chris’ side in the situation because in keeping me under Chris’ abusive authority allows you to maintain your dominance over Jackie. If you ever accept that a woman can leave her husband to avoid abuse then that empowers Jackie to leave you when you become abusive. You have indicated by your own words that you have been abusive at times and that it became worse since associating with Chris so I have to wonder whose demons are affecting who. Jackie has spoken to me about this in private but I’m sure will deny it in your presents for the same reason I lied about the quality of my marriage to Chris, fear of more abuse. Your own mother has noticed the change in you and the verbal abuse since you began associating with Chris. Speaking of your mother you debased yourself again by using her to lay a guilt trip on us which is all her perspective was, it offered no observations or solutions only guilt.

You say that God wants to redeem my marriage: Yes, God is a Redeemer! God redeemed me out of an abusive marriage and has given me a life of Peace. He has become my husband (Isaiah 54) and provider until such time as He may choose to provide me with another human one. He is an awesome Redeemer!

You insist that Chris has realized his sin and repented: He always “realizes his sin and is always working on it” this is a manipulative gesture only that you have fallen for. In fact, since this has been a long term issue with many artificial repentances and returns to previous behavior my response to this is; If he is truly repentant he will correct his behavior and demonstrate his repentance in spite of our divorce because it is right, and reconciliation can take place later if God Chooses.

I’m afraid I also have to consider you a liar now because you deliberately let your leadership believe that Chris made us come to church when if you remember ( or do you forget like Chris when it’s convenient) it was Collin who convinced first Chris then me to come to church Chris had nothing to do with it. It was me who would get up against Chris’ will and bring Collin to Church early on many mornings then return Clean–up and wait for Chris to get off his ass in front of the TV and get ready so we could walk in at the last minute. If you paid the least attention to the times I have come to church since I left Chris I have been there ready to go early with the people helping set up, Chris still wandered in at the last minute before Sunday school. You also make my charge about Chris not protecting me all based on his driving and ignored the far greater issue of him commingling funds (which he still hasn’t stopped) in the business putting me at risk of financial ruin and federal prosecution. Financial ruin because I’m the one with the steady job that would ultimately have to repay the tax debt with all penalties and interest in the event I escape prosecution. He’s welcome to risk himself if he wishes but he has no right to risk me unless I am to assume I’m required to submit all the way to federal prison. As the bookkeeper I’m the one the IRS will scrutinize the hardest. You made it look like the charges against Chris were fairly petty and I should be more forgiving if you had any real interest in being completely open and honest everybody in that room should have read the letter I gave to Chris. Your problem (aside from not wanting any version of the situation but yours being revealed) was you could not ask me for a copy of it without exposing your ambush nor could you get Chris’ copy because you told him to burn it which tells me the meeting you and Jackie had with me was just a dog and pony show to convince me you had my interest at heart which I now know is pure horse spit as you like to put it. I wonder how Bill your friend of 20 plus years who served with you and protected you in law enforcement feels about being ambushed. The look on his face when he came in tells me you didn’t give him a heads up about what was to take place. Just for the record I believe Jesus said he did nothing in secret pertaining to His ministry.

Your hypocrisy record is world class you accuse me of being unforgiving because I refuse to return to an abusive spiritually detrimental relationship. Then turn and make an accusation against Troy and the tone of your voice screamed grudge [unforgiveness]. Not knowing the history I contacted Troy and asked him why Andy would harbor a grudge against him. He said he was unaware that Andy still held any animosity toward him but it has to stem from the arrest that took place in 1999 that caused Bill and Jeff a lot of havoc in their lives. He said he held no animosity toward you and that he has invited you to opening and anniversary celebrations at his new location also that Andrew and David your sons have trained at his facility at discounted rates. Since Troy has always conducted himself as a gentleman in my presence and completely open about his arrest I can only conclude that his statements are true and that you are not only unforgiving toward him but ungrateful for the service to your sons as well. I have overheard on several occasions the comments between David and Andrew about Bill being under Troy’s influence and it sounded like they were more interested in classes on this side of town than any real concern for Bill and why didn’t they take these concerns to Bill. I have also seen the interaction and heard the conversations between Troy and Bill yes Troy is the boss at the school but in all matters Biblical Troy considers Bill the authority. This is just one more example of your jumping to conclusion because you’re too self-righteous and prideful to ask a simple question just like you did with my income and how it was all spent on me when in fact we have been living on it for the last 3 months because Chris hasn’t worked enough to earn a paycheck. In fact he has worked so little this year the company is $50,000 plus in the red so much for the conclusion that Chris has earn all this money and provided a good living for me and explains why my boss had to purchase a truck for me so I could have reliable transportation. My boss will be happy to verify the things he does for me that Chris should be doing but will not.

Proverbs 9:7-9 warns us that "Whoever corrects a mocker invites insult; whoever rebukes a wicked man incurs abuse. Do not rebuke a mocker or he will hate you; rebuke a wise man and he will love you. Instruct a wise man and he will be wiser still; teach a righteous man and he will add to his learning. I guess your response to this letter will tell us which group you belong to. I expect to hear more of the same rhetoric about having a demon or this letter is more Dr. Philthy or Oprah Winfry. You’ll probably pull out that I don’t have the authority to rebuke you elevating yourself above others just like in Catholicism. I’m glad I don’t have to be worried about being burnt at the stake but I’m sure you’ll give it your best effort to do it verbally. The hardest part is the betrayal of someone professing to be a man of God who would gladly sacrifice one of his flock to a ravenous wolf for his own selfish reasons i.e. to maintain dominance over his own wife. I hope you repent and confess this and any other hidden sin because Jesus will surely rip your church from you if you do not. I wonder if this is the reason your church will not grow. Is it because Jesus will not bless you with more disciples as you have not proven completely faithful with what you have so you will not be trusted with more and your losing people on top of it but of course it’s always their fault.

Sincerely,

****

Letter From Bill to Andy

Andy,

This is the hardest and most painful letter I have ever written but it needed to be done. I chose this method rather than face to face because the anger that would most likely be generated would not be beneficial to any of the persons involved. If it isn’t already apparent I have left your congregation for a multitude of factors which I expect you to deny but I will express them and it’s between you and Jesus from then on.

The first and biggest problem is your self-righteous attitude that has developed over the last couple of years. You will not take criticism in any form it’s your version and interpretation of Scripture or you ridicule and declare the person who is in disagreement has a demon just like the Roman Catholic Church did. You have gotten to the point you won’t even discuss it you get mad and make an excuse to end the conversation. To be blunt you have fallen for the pride of life of Satan based on your knowledge. You want your leadership to be bobbing heads and yes men with no conscience of their own. I for one will never surrender mine as Luther said, “Scripture is my authority my conscience is my guide.” Your conduct at the Matthew 18 ambush was proof of what you expect I went along only because of Doris being present. I continued to go along so I could step down from associate pastor and leave correctly. More proof of your superior attitude is your failure to answer Rebekah’s letter in reply to the Matthew 18 ambush. You should know that I read the letter between our talk on Thursday night and Sunday and I agree with 90% of it. I gave you Sunday to confess and repent of the sin in your life just like I did but you did not.

Your abusive nature has come to the for front and I have no idea when or where you think you have the right to scream and yell at me for any length of time let alone use language to indicate to me that you should have done it longer when I gave you a chance to apologize. I am not your wife or one of your kids you got a pass the last time but don’t ever do it again. You told me you never abuse Jackie but I have personally watched you blow up, scream and yell at her for petty offenses. On the Monday she called me to find you, you deliberately acted in a manner to make her believe you may be contemplating suicide just to hurt her and induce a guilty trip which is classic control and manipulation used by abusive people. You tried to use Doris to guilt trip Rebekah and me but her having lived with it for years saw right through it I did too for other reasons. You changed tactics of manipulation with me on Thursday night when you came over by telling me how much you needed me trying to appeal to my sense of duty which you know is strong. You even tried to throw me a bone by saying my actions could save somebody who doesn’t have the strength. First of all I can’t save anyone that’s Jesus’ job. I really don’t see how you need me because you haven’t listen to my advice, to any substance in 2 years or more. Now that I have stepped down as a pastor I can’t teach or preach for you when you’re out of town. We rarely get together anymore because Chris has taken that spot with alarming frequency. So it must be the tithe and rent that makes me important to you.

Unfortunately my near photographic memory has recorded too many comments in the last several months that you have made concerning the size of your paycheck and or otherwise about the financial situation you are in. The most alarming one was Sunday after my email that you all but completely ignored but after telling me that morning that you agreed with it about 98% you said, “It’s easy for other people to let people leave the church but I’m living on a thousand a month.” I was speechless the man that taught me to tithe and let Jesus worry about the bills just strongly indicated to me that he had stopped living by faith and was willing to sacrifice a member of his flock to an abusive demoniac for a paycheck, and had become a hireling.

Your hypocrisy toward Rebekah is disgusting to me because you claim to have caught her in an adulterous affair 3 years ago even though you never saw a sexual act take place. You’ve also held that against her the proof being every time we discussed the situation concerning her you always brought that up. Yet you bragged to me about how Melinda Strom gave you a blowjob (possibly plural) in the armory [at Perryville] and how good it was because she had false teeth she could remove. Both of you were married at the time. Since you made Rebekah and me confess in front of the leadership and Chris I sincerely hope you already have (and I seriously doubt it) or will confess in front of the leadership and Jackie. That memory I have just won’t leave you alone. If you think that was a long time ago I’ve never found a statue of limitations on un-confessed sin in Scripture.

Finally contrary to what you said on Friday night you have lied to me and twisted the facts on several occasions during this crisis to protect Chris or an attempt to turn me against Rebekah. Again it’s that memory that has caught you in inconsistent versions of the same story or telling me something I knew not to be true because I had personal firsthand knowledge of the situation. You apparently forgot who you were talking too, my memory capability and my ability to put two and two to together. I don’t know what I should be madder at that you did lie to me or that you thought I was stupid enough to believe it. I don’t feel like writing all of the occasions that would take far too long and you’re going to deny it anyway but I’ll give you an example of how you gave yourself away. When you called and screamed me for 30 minutes you said Rebekah was very cold to you on the previous Monday night. Your problem was that the last thing I heard as I was walking to my truck was Rebekah asking Chris if he would wait a minute so she could hug the pastor. Doesn’t sound cold to me so you deliberately lied to me in an attempt to turn me against Rebekah and join yours and Chris’ demons to keep her enslaved for Chris. I think the Bible calls this kind of lying witchcraft.

By your own words no one in the church has the right to rebuke you ok then the LORD rebuke you. I have every faith that He will if you do not repent before Him and the church.

I will not entertain phone calls or other communication I see no reason to drags this painful experience out any longer. I’ll go my way and you can go yours if reconciliation is in Jesus’ plan for us He will bring us together when the time comes. I have moved from the church property and have left some property in the well house and the storage building. Feel free to throw the stuff out, use it, or sell it and use the proceeds for the church.

Bill

I pray that if any of you have made it this far that you can see the hypocritical demonic influence this man Andy Tryon, and his wife Jackie Tryon have and my prayer is that no one is led astray on behalf of this Wolf in Sheeps clothing!

Shalom Achim!
Joel